It is awesome to see how God works in our lives and how He holds everything in His hands! “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28) We desired for our children to be close in age, and after having Jax, we left our family planning in God’s hands. He truly is in control anyways so we trusted God’s plan and will for our family. We got pregnant pretty quickly with Jax, and we imagined (Lord willing) that our next child would be about 2 years younger than Jax. Well, my fertility took longer to return than we thought. I continued breastfeeding Jax, and Ryan and I decided to let him wean when he was ready which can further delay fertility in some women. At times I questioned this decision but I felt this was an important issue for me, and I wanted to leave God in control and trust His timing was perfect.
In January 2013, our pastor preached a sermon on fasting and talked about how fasting can change our heart as we deny ourselves a physical need/habit (food, media, Facebook, spending, etc) and seek the Lord and hear from Him. Our pastor challenged us to fast and pray for two things: 1) our city and God to work in our city and 2) a personal request on our heart. I knew immediately the Lord was calling me to fast and pray for our future child. I did a short fast from food and an extended fast from Facebook (I think around a month or so). I began praying for God’s will and for His plan for our family to be clear to me. I asked Him if His will was for me to be pregnant again or if He would add another child to our family in another way. I wasn’t sure God would give me a clear answer on this or tell me to wait, but I continued to pray and seek the Lord. At same time, I was in a Bible study of Genesis through Bible Study Fellowship. As I was reading about Abraham and Sarah, I saw God’s faithfulness to them in fulfilling His promise of giving them a son even though Sarah was 90 years old and Abraham was 100! It was simply amazing to see God’s power through the impossible and His faithfulness! Through this study and prayer, I felt God clearly showing me He would give us another child. I shared this with Ryan, and we were excited to watch how God would work. I felt it would be soon, but God’s timing of soon isn’t the same as mine! These verses greatly encouraged my heart over the next months:
“I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?” –Jeremiah 32:27
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” –Isaiah 41:10
“ ‘Do I bring to the moment of birth and not give delivery?’ says the Lord. ‘Do I close up the womb when I bring to delivery?’ says your God.” –Isaiah 66:9
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” –Proverbs 3:5-6
“Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from Him.” –Psalm 127:3
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” –John 14:27
I continued to pray and wait on the Lord and trusted His faithfulness and His plan. We undertook a healing diet called the GAPS diet to help heal some food sensitivities in our family and did the Intro diet from March to May 2013. In May, we switched to the full GAPS diet and this has been great for us! It was so wonderful how God answered our prayers for healing and how much this helped Jax especially! Jax was finally able to tolerate some dairy products- homemade yogurt (from raw milk)! This was so exciting for us! Jax wasn’t a very picker eater before the diet, but this helped him eat some foods he wasn’t too fond of previously. We found some new super foods that we liked- such as sauerkraut! I felt my body was able to clean out toxins and further break sugar cravings. I felt God used this diet to make our bodies healthier. I learned even more about food and how God created our bodies and food to nourish us both during pregnancy and all of life. I am also so thankful for the amazing farm (Yonder Way Farm) that provides the most amazing eggs, chicken, beef, and pork that I’ve ever had!
As Jax approached his second birthday, I started getting the questions more and more… “So when are you going to have another baby?” “Do you want more than one?” “Are you going to try for a second baby?” and the one I was most shocked by, “Most people have another baby when their first is two, so are you planning for another one?” (I just had to laugh on the inside!) Most of the time, it was from almost strangers and acquaintances. I usually responded with, “Whenever God gives us another baby!” If they continued to press, I would say “Well it hasn’t happened yet, but we will be excited when it does!” Although this question had the potential to totally make me sad and wonder when God would bring another baby, His Word and His faithfulness upheld me. I trusted His timing was best and His peace guarded my heart. I embraced the sweet boy God had already blessed us with and wanted to cherish the time it was just me and my buddy Jax! I felt one day he would have siblings to enjoy, but right now God gave me special moments with Jax! Jax sure has stolen our hearts, and Ryan and I are thankful for the joy he adds to our life each day!
One evening, Ryan asked me if I had taken a pregnancy test recently, and I told him I would take one the next day. Well, on August 28, 2013, Ryan came home to this:
The test was positive!!! I was so excited and couldn’t wait to tell Daddy! Jax and I went to the store and bought this balloon and a card for Ryan! Ryan must have been pretty sure I was pregnant because he showed up at home with these:
He didn’t know I was pregnant before he got home but I guess God was telling him first!
It was a joyful time in our house praising God for the new life He created inside me! God answered our prayers, and He showed His continued faithfulness to us! The first Sunday after we found out we were pregnant (September 1, 2013), our pastor preached his sermon on fasting and prayer! It was basically a follow-up sermon to the one he preached in January and he talked about how God was using fasting and prayer to change the lives of several people in our church family. Was this a mere coincidence? I think not! The Lord reminded me of His faithfulness as I trusted His timing and He reminded me of His peace, strength, comfort, and love that I had experienced over the last year! God is so good and provides for our every need. I cried and thanked God for this gift of new life and for the greatest gift He could give me – His presence that never leaves me! This time I decided to fast from Facebook and focus on praising and thanking God for our new tiny baby He was forming in my womb!
The Lord brought immediate joy to me as soon as I found out I was pregnant and complete trust that He was in control of all things. Although I knew there was no promise of everything being okay, I had an indescribable peace and lack of common fears I experienced in the early days of my pregnancy with Jax. I knew this was from the Lord and He was giving me an incredible joy and not allowing Satan to steal my joy with fears of the unknown. Even though we would not be seeing our midwife until about 9-10 weeks, we could not wait to tell our family the exciting news! We also decided to skip the early ultrasound and just plan on doing the 20 week ultrasound; again a totally different peace and trust in the Lord that I had not experienced before. God is so good!
“For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” -Psalm 139:13-16“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” –Deuteronomy 31:8
We shared our exciting news with our families when I was 5 weeks (September 6-7)! We showed up at our parent’s homes, and Jax held a chalkboard sign that said “I have a SECERT.” When he moved the sign, his shirt said “Big Brother Jax 2014.” They were surprised and it was a really fun way to tell them! We called or FaceTimed our siblings too! It was a blast!
Baby Shearer #2 is due in May! Thank you Lord for this sweet new blessing! Jax is excited to be a “big budder” and asks a lot about “baby”!
